Frequent topics in my work
Depression | Loneliness | Anxiety | Life Crises | Self-Esteem | Suicidal Thoughts | Relationships
You hesitate about counsellors?
One thing I can tell you for sure: I am not the typical psychotherapist and counsellor.
Warm-hearted by nature, very clear and precise in my thinking – most people know precisely who they are dealing with. I also have a good sense of humour (at least I like to think so). And I don’t believe that counselling, psychotherapy or coaching should be a strange, distant or somehow unpleasant experience. On the contrary, the only way you will be able to understand yourself and solve your problems is through open, motivating and goal-oriented conversations between two people as equals.
My foundation is person-centred counselling or talking therapy. In other words, I work in an empathic, authentic and encouraging way. I am not writing this here to score points. Yes, I have a degree in psychology, qualified as a psychotherapist and am learning all the time to be a skilled counsellor psychologist. But none of that makes me an expert for your life. Only you are! I am the one who helps you unravel your inside knot with a natural flowing conversation to help you achieve the change you wish to see.
You will not find me to be judgmental. In fact, if you have chosen to trust me, I consider that a very special thing. I do not intend to harm this unique therapeutic relationship by being judgmental.
You really are pretty well put together.
But there are a few loose ends that do not all go very well.
By and large, things are working out well for you. You have a decent reputation in your profession. You take care of yourself now and again. You are not annoying anyone when things go badly. You still have your dreams.
You’re not perfect, but you’re enough – and it’s time you start to realise that too.
But at times there is this nagging feeling inside you that things in your life are not adding up: You are feeling exhausted. You are lonely. You are nothing but sad. You feel anxious all the time. Your relationship is breaking up. You want to feel better, but you can’t seem to get there. What’s more, all the tactics you’ve tried to change this haven’t been successful.
Maybe you have considered counselling, but the idea makes you feel uncomfortable. To be honest, there is also a bit of fear about how the counsellor may think about you. You have the feeling that such a move is rather drastic or exaggerated.
It can be different. Person-centred counselling happens on an equal level and accepts you exactly as you are! As a people-centred counsellor, I stand out from other approaches (such as psychoanalysis or behavioural therapy) in the following ways:
We see all of the person (not only the individual problem).
As a result, our goal is not to solve a specific problem in a stand-alone approach. Instead, the focus is on your overall mental fitness. Helping you cope with both the current problem and later difficulties in a better way: becoming more independent, more responsible, less confused, better organised.
Our focus is the here and now (not the early childhood unconscious).
For us, there is rarely a need to ask “why” or to do a comprehensive analysis of childhood. This is because the significant patterns always show up today as well.
We focus on your strengths (not your deficits).
It is about you and what you can do – not about your psychological state. We see you as the expert in your life, which you are.
We emphasise your individual freedom.
In person-centred counselling, we see the potential which is inherent in individual freedom – both large and small. Specifically, one way in which this is manifested is that the client brings his or her own problems into the session and effectively “leads” the entire session (not the therapist). As such, the approach is ideal for people who are motivated by self-knowledge and are willing to work towards the solution of their problems.
The therapeutic relationship itself is an important part of therapy.
What is known as the therapeutic relationship provides a positive experience and is the key element of therapy in our work. In a climate of conversation that is non-judgmental, respectful and empathetic, people succeed in understanding themselves, making important decisions on their own and building good relationships with other people.
Frequently Asked Questions
How much do you charge for a session?
Each session is 60 minutes long and 190,- Euro.
On my booking page you will also find packages that offer a 10% or 20% discount.
Does the public health insurance in Germany cover your counselling?
This counselling is a strictly private service and unfortunately not covered by the public health insurance. With private health insurance, there is sometimes the option of having the costs covered. However, this is rather the exception, as I do not charge according to the scale of fees for psychotherapists (GOP), which is often a prerequisite for private health insurance. It is recommended that you check the insurance plan you have signed up for.
What qualifications do you have?
I am a qualified psychologist (Technical University Berlin 2004), s state-licensed non-medical practitioner for psychotherapy and currently in training as a person-centred counsellor with the GwG (Gesellschaft für Personzentrierte Psychotherapie und Beratung e.V.). At the DFI (German Focusing Institute) I am currently undergoing training in Focusing, another humanistic form of therapy with a stronger emphasis on the body. Through regular supervision and training therapy with a person-centred colleague, I take deliberate care of my own personal development and ensure that I consistently provide my clients with the best support.
Which psychological approach do you apply?
My foundation is the person-centred approach to counselling and psychotherapy – also known as talking therapy. It was founded by the American psychologist Carl Rogers and focuses on the therapist’s empathic and authentic attitude and on the respect he or she shows to the client. For us, this means meeting the client in an non-judgmental and open-minded way. Person-centred counselling and therapy belongs to the group of humanistic therapies.
Besides humanistic psychotherapy as a major “line”, there are also psychodynamic and behavioural therapies. Among all three, various specific therapeutic approaches have become established, as its original ideas continue to be developed.
- Basically, however, psychodynamic approaches are about the unconscious and childhood (because the origin was good old Sigmund Freud). The therapist adopts the role of the expert here.
- In behavioural therapy approaches, the guiding idea is that any beneficial or harmful behaviour can be learned and therefore unlearned. In other words, here the therapist works primarily with beneficial and non-beneficial thoughts (or cognitions). Again, the therapist is more in the role of expert or teacher.
- In humanistic approaches, including person-centred therapy, the therapist works explicitly on an equal footing with the client. The focus is placed on the client and not on the problem. The aim is that the client, with the help of the therapist, explores their behaviour and finds the capacity for self-fulfilment that is inherent in them so that they can solve their problems on their own.
How often do we need to meet?
Empirical evidence and research shows that for many clients a fairly small number of sessions is enough to deal with an acute problem: on average 6 to 8. Of course, this can be varied upwards or downwards from person to person.
More difficult issues (such as depression), obviously, take longer – here it may take 20, 30 or more appointments before a client feels stable again.
Another example where it usually takes a little longer: Recent research has shown that clients with suicidal ideations tend to need an average of 15 sessions before they could experience a significant improvement in their well-being.
Is your online counselling 100% secure in terms of data protection?
It is. I use the commercial version of Zoom for online calls. Here I have both specified the location of the server (EU) and set up strict end-to-end encryption of the calls. According to current standards, this meets the EU’s strict data protection guidelines. However, I always keep my eyes open and always adapt when data protection changes – or Zoom.
Do I need to prepare for the counselling sessions?
Research shows that the absolutely most important parameter for the success of counselling or therapy is the client’s participation. You might also say: It is you, not me, who makes our work successful.
In general, the client grows most in the counselling process when they have a positive but realistic attitude towards the counselling. Or to be even more precise:
- when they expect the counselling to be helpful
- when they are aware that counselling can sometimes be challenging and difficult
- if they are clear about what counselling actually is and why they are doing it.
That is all you need to prepare.
What does "counselling" mean?
Counselling is a term that has become strongly established in the US and UK. (In Germany it is often translated as “therapeutic consultation” or “psychological consultation”).
It is the type of treatment that deals with “milder” mental health problems: anxiety, depression, loneliness, to name but a few. This differs from clinical psychotherapy, which, often in clinics, treats “more severe” cases, e.g. schizophrenic patients.
In Anglo-Saxon countries, however, many people argue that there is actually no fundamental difference between counselling and psychotherapy. The only difference is the setting: counselling is provided in a private practice, while psychotherapy takes place in a clinic.
Do you ever google your clients?
I don’t. Neither before the first session nor afterwards. The reasons are as follows:
- First, I want to understand how you experience the situation and how reality feels to you. Online posts would only be a distraction, maybe even a harm.
- Secondly, I consider it a serious breach of trust, because you as a client expect me to know nothing more about you than what you tell me.
- Thirdly, most of the content in the internet is surface or a facade – the opposite of what happens in therapy and counselling. So it wouldn’t help at all.
Do you also work with children and young people?
I work with both adults and young people.
However, I’m afraid I’m neither trained nor equipped to work with children.
Let’s get started.
We can meet either in my private practice in Berlin at Kurfürstendamm/Zoologischer Garten or online from anywhere in the world. You can also mix the two and we can meet live in the practice one day and via Zoom the next. Simply click on the yellow booking button to book your preferred appointment.
Please also note that my counselling is not covered by public health insurance in Germany which means that I can only work with self-pay clients. A 60 minute therapy session will cost 190,- €.
To contact me, there are several channels available to you:
- Please book your appointment directly in my calendar.
- You are welcome to write to me at office@brittabettendorf.com
- You can also call me on 030-220131181.
I am very much looking forward to hearing from you!
This post is also available in: German
Member of Gesellschaft für Personzentrierte Psychotherapie und Beratung e.V.